April Fools’ Day

I’m Back

Two things happened over the weekend that were of some significance. The first was the drawing for the big, very big, lottery; and the second I will talk about later in this post.

The lottery drawing was held at 10:45 Friday evening. The local stations ran crawls across the screen saying they would have the winning numbers at the 11 o’clock newscast. I gathered my five lottery tickets, note pad and pen and sat impatiently waiting to write down my magic numbers. Out of all the numbers drawn and all the possible combinations I possessed only one of the winning numbers. So here I am, as promised, continuing my blog for another day since I didn’t win. As you can tell, I’m not jetting off to my deserted island counting my millions.

Even though no one in Ohio won the big lottery the link below says that 10 won $250,000. They possessed all the winning numbers but missed the Mega Ball number. All were auto-pick tickets. Two of the winners are from the Central Ohio area.

So my big question is—did any of my readers win the $250,000 and if so, how about a loan?

http://www.dispatch.com/content/stories/local/2012/03/31/newark-ticket-worth-$250000.html

 Now on to other business—I enjoy Sunday mornings when I usually fix pancakes for breakfast and leisurely read the Sunday paper. I always read the sections in a particular order with the Arts and Entertainment section first followed by Home and Garden and then Travel. After those three sections I then go about my tasks and fill in with the remaining sections later on Sunday or the next day.

Yesterday’s Travel column by Steve Stephens caught my eye headlined Ticket to Write: Sculpture sure to be a whopper. The whole column was about a small village on Lake Erie erecting a huge 100 ft. long neon sculpture atop the town hall honoring the invasive pest the Asian Carp. The village is doing this in hopes of attracting tourism. The planned sculpture will be large enough to be seen from both the Lake Erie Marblehead lighthouse and the Cleveland Browns Stadium.

As I read it I thought, “Boy this must be some hick town. Who would want to put up such an ugly thing?”

In addition, the sculpture will be built by the local middle school Home Ec class. The article quotes the mayor as saying, “We would have liked to have the art classes build the fish…but the school eliminated the art program last year due to budget cuts.”

As a proponent for the arts I’m thinking—true, the arts are always the first classes to be cut but I’m not sure the Home Ec classes will be able to handle such a large project. And, why the Home Ec class?

The article continues, “Admission to the fish — which will also house the county agriculture museum, the town’s famous mastodon and the last pair of false teeth owned by author O. Henry — will be $17.”

As I near the end I’m thinking what a hideous mess, I’m sure not going to travel to this town. The piece closes with– For more information, call the Grand Trompe Chamber of Commerce, Industry and Light Opera, or consult the date at the top of this page.

What?! I had been had. The date was April 1. I enjoy a good joke, even if it is on me. Happy belated April Fool’s Day.

 http://www.dispatch.com/content/stories/travel/2012/04/01/1-sculpture-sure-to-be-a-whopper.html

 

 

BREAKING NEWS: GOVERNOR, LEGISLATORS AGREE TO TEACH IN PUBLIC SCHOOLS

The front crossview mirror of a school bus; it...

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In light of the recent controversy regarding teachers and SB 5, governor Kasich and many legislators have agreed to teach in public schools for the next grading period.

They agreed to remain in the classrooms the entire grading period stating, “How hard can it be?” They continued that they look forward to the comfort of leaving work at three o’clock daily so they can catch up on much needed sleep and workout time. When reminded they would have to prepare lesson plans, grade papers, and arrange graphic presentations they said they would refer these duties to their able aides. When reminded they would have no aides or secretaries for paper work and classroom presentations, governor Kasich replied, “Then I will just talk to them all day as I have done on the campaign trail and at Fox News.”

In addition, governor Kasich agreed to take on the extra duty of driving a school bus. Referring to his recent comments that he is driving the bus and you are either on it or you will be run over, Kasich pointed to his excellent driving record. He stated that he drove SB 5 over bumpy roads to adoption and feels navigating a school bus will be no different. When asked about his confrontation with a state highway patrol officer regarding a traffic violation, Kasich stated he felt certain that incident did not disqualify him from driving a bus. As governor he would see to it there were no obstacles ahead.

Many legislators also felt confident and felt no special education or preparation would be necessary for the upcoming task. One lawmaker was overheard to say he spent 12 years in a public classroom and felt he knew all he needed to know about teaching.

A spokesman for the teachers stated, “We are looking forward to an extended spring break. Many of us will be seeking new employment or taking on a second job.” One student commented she was looking forward to the change. “The teachers are wise to our tricks so now we get to educate a whole bunch of newbies.”

An interested parent commented she was looking forward to the experiment. Referring to talk of parents taking over failing schools she said, “I feel certain my son’s school will be in the failing group and then I can take over the system myself. I look forward to seeing that my son has all the additional help he needs, regardless of the other students’ needs. My son is the one who counts,” she said.

When asked about the significance of announcing this plan on April first, Kasich said he saw no correlation between the timing of the announcement and April Fools Day.